| | Recently, I've been extremely paranoid. I jump at loud noises, I can't go downstairs at night when it's dark unless I know my mom/dad/brother is downstairs (and if I do go downstairs, I run like hell back up stairs), I'm easily frightened in dark places, I can't stand being home alone anymore, and horrible, tragic thoughts pop up in my head. This past week has been filled with dreams that replay in my head. They're not nightmares, they're just bad dreams where bad things happen. What really bothers me is why all of a sudden? I've been having dreamless sleeps, and yet when it came to this week, I've been having horrible dreams that are not worth remembering.
In those dreams, bad things happen to me and my family.
I'm not trying to be overly dramatic - I really do get freaked out about these type of things, but honestly, what can I do? Is it because I've been worrying about things I shouldn't be worrying about? Is it because of me stressing out about my grades? Awaetjklawejklr yuck. I'm not even sure myself. I thought I've been pretty content lately.
On the contrary, I seem to be slowly but surely finding my place and my people at school. Hanging out with guys always make things easier. Shout out to Brendan for showing me that I'm not the only one who still feels this way. I love love love talking to the guys, they bring up so much random talks (yet interesting), and it's never awkward. Also, being the person I am, I need tons of motivation, and as of lately, it seems like people saying the smallest things can make a huge impact on me.
I hate looking at the news. I hate hearing about the inflation in rice, gas prices, and food products in general. Just a moment ago, I went downstairs and was mesmerised by something on TV about Lake Chad used to be a lake but is no longer a lake beacuse of the earth's heat, and how the water evaporated. Either that or there is barely any remains of the lake due to climate changes. I hate knowing that global warming is happening right at this moment, this minute. I hate knowing that our water supply is going like there is no tomorrow.
Ugh, the world is cruel. |
| | Posted 4/24/2008 9:15 PM - 83 Views - 10 eProps - 6 comments
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