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SubscriptionsSites I Read
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| I'm not ready to part with Xanga yet, so know that I'm still logging on regularly to check up on your blogs.
My blogs can now be found here: http://www.seacilly.net/blog.php
Leave some comments, will you? (:
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Click on image > Seacilly.net
Go check it out! | | |
| Recently, I've been extremely paranoid. I jump at loud noises, I can't go downstairs at night when it's dark unless I know my mom/dad/brother is downstairs (and if I do go downstairs, I run like hell back up stairs), I'm easily frightened in dark places, I can't stand being home alone anymore, and horrible, tragic thoughts pop up in my head. This past week has been filled with dreams that replay in my head. They're not nightmares, they're just bad dreams where bad things happen. What really bothers me is why all of a sudden? I've been having dreamless sleeps, and yet when it came to this week, I've been having horrible dreams that are not worth remembering.
In those dreams, bad things happen to me and my family.
I'm not trying to be overly dramatic - I really do get freaked out about these type of things, but honestly, what can I do? Is it because I've been worrying about things I shouldn't be worrying about? Is it because of me stressing out about my grades? Awaetjklawejklr yuck. I'm not even sure myself. I thought I've been pretty content lately.
On the contrary, I seem to be slowly but surely finding my place and my people at school. Hanging out with guys always make things easier. Shout out to Brendan for showing me that I'm not the only one who still feels this way. I love love love talking to the guys, they bring up so much random talks (yet interesting), and it's never awkward. Also, being the person I am, I need tons of motivation, and as of lately, it seems like people saying the smallest things can make a huge impact on me.
I hate looking at the news. I hate hearing about the inflation in rice, gas prices, and food products in general. Just a moment ago, I went downstairs and was mesmerised by something on TV about Lake Chad used to be a lake but is no longer a lake beacuse of the earth's heat, and how the water evaporated. Either that or there is barely any remains of the lake due to climate changes. I hate knowing that global warming is happening right at this moment, this minute. I hate knowing that our water supply is going like there is no tomorrow.
Ugh, the world is cruel. | | |
| Of course I'm disappointed. Who in their right minds wouldn't be? Once again, I've set myself up and had myself hoping and longing for the thing that is currently my goal to become. Like those other time, I've failed. I wasn't favored among the others running against me.
This time, it's different. I believe that although I had not been chosen, just shadowing the officers could really help me out so much for next year when I run again. Yes, it's not "if" I decide to run, it's "when" I run. Just because I ran and wasn't elected to be historian doesn't mean that I won't run again. Too bad you won't see me running for historian next year. It's on for bigger and better things, and when the time comes for the elections for the 2009-2010 Interact officers, I will have the knowledge, skills, and the experiences. You can't compete with that.
So, I think I will enjoy my next year being an active member and hopefully a bit more. I'm not disappointed. All I have to remind myself is that this opens up a lot of opportunities for me to soak up knowledge.
Don't forget, this means I will be spending a bit more time with them. I don't mind!
Less talk about the classic fail and more about the days and plan, shall we? After running the four cougar laps today (17:11!), Marisa, Kim, and I were talking about our plans for the summer and what we wanted to accomplish. Well, already, most of my summer days will be consumed by Math Enrichment, and when that ends, that leaves me about a week or two to enjoy and busy myself. During that two weeks, I'm seriously going to crunch up my whole plan for the summer's worth and finish whatever I haven't finished. After that, it's that 9AM-9PM marching band practice, also known as band camp. Following that is first day of sophomore. Hopefully, I get to keep myself occupied on the weekends too. I don't want it to be exactly like how it is during the school year.
Oh man, my summer is already filled.
Well, life has been pretty dull if you ask me, but that can't stop me. The school year is ending soon, so I'm definitely going to make these next few weeks and month worthwhile.
Shout out to Thuy because she's like dying to read my blog. :)
*I did a Warhead challenge today, and I think I just killed my tongue. Five extreme sour warheads + Tricia = 2938479237 faces, but I survived. Who's the man?! I'm the man. I currently have a love/hate relationship with Calvin and Mony. And for the record, water tastes disgustingly funny if you drink it right after you've done the challenge. (I'll post the video later.)
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